Ada yang bergetar di hati,
Ada yang berirama di jiwa,
Ada yang berlagu di sanubari,
Aku yang menanti,
Aku yang menunggu,
Aku yang mengharap,
Hati akan bergetar suka,
Jiwa akan berirama gembira,
Sanubari akan berlagu ceria,
hingga kini tak pernah pasti,
Sampai bila,
Aku akan terus mengharap.
After ten years I never had chance to do this third pillar of Islam with the family finally here I am, I am greeting ramadhan at home with my family. The most important this is that I can spend my whole ramadhan here at my HOME. This is the sweetness of ramadhan for me for this year. With this ramadhan, I got some good news too. Thank to Allah who had given me a lot of things to cherish my ramadhan. Alhamdulillah.
I hope I can use this opportunity to increase my faith toward Him. I need to improve my ibadah because I have been given some rare opportunity for this year. With the holiday and I am spending time at home, there is no reason for me not to strive for the ibadah. I need to double up my effort. I hope this ramadhan may bring something different from other the past ramadhan.
This year, I do not need to worry about anything, whether the ticket or the holiday. It will be enough holidays for this raya and of course I never need to buy ticket for “balik kampong”. This is a very different environment for me after spending almost ten year fasting at the hostel, starting from form one until I am a student at the university, I never had time like this. Although I might be missing the best part which is the journey from KL to JITRA with bus, but still fasting at home is a very sweet moment. Plus, I am not sure if I can spend my ramadhan like this for the next year. I’m hoping for the same situation for next year but only HE knows the best for me.
I am hoping for blessing for this ramadhan. I hope I can achieve my target for this ramadhan. It might sound easy but to implement it, is not the easy as you say. It is easy say then doing it. I’ll pray from HIM so that I will be given some strength to achieve my aim for this ramadhan.
On that day I saw many different faces, nervous, happy, excited and confident. Some claimed to me that they had been for some training for being a facilitator so she had no problems to be interviewed but some was very nervous and cannot speak at all. When I went to the toilet one of them were talking about spot questions the interviewer might asked. For me that was my third interview and at this moment I don’t expect too much from the interview. After the two interviewed I had gone through, there was no expectation for me to be accepted as one of the students there. So I just had my own plan, which I will continue my ambition to be a psychologist.
I was trying to be very friendly to others because in my mind, if there was an opportunity for me to be accepted in the course so it will be easier to get friends. But to be friendly with nervous person was not easy; they seem very close in person and did not want to talk with others. I was trying to be funny and help them with the things I know with my past experiences. At the end I am the one who had been left alone because I am the last one in the name list. I was so disappointed to be left alone and I had been thinking how I am supposed to find some friend with people like them in the institute.
I never thought that I will be friends with them especially with their attitude towards me, but we cannot judge people with hours meeting. They might be different from what you had seen them before. In fact the situation back then did not give the opportunity for us to be friends especially when you were in a stressful situation. Never judge them without knowing them better. Now after three years as an education student, they are the best friend ever. We knew each other better when we open our self to others. Learn to know other before making any perception about your friend. We never know when we will be friends and when we will become good friends, sometime even the one that we hate the most can be the best friend ever. Now, they are best friend some one that we can rely on when we in need. They are friends in need and friends indeed. For Roziana and Nur Sa’adah thank you for being good friends for me in such time the sad and the happy moment.
a picture from the school orientation program at SMK Sungai Pusu
Julai dah hampir ke penghujungnya. August lagi dua tiga hari nak tunjukkan diri. Aku kat sini masih sendiri, so what is the co-relation with the topic. Sebenarnya sejak dua menjak ni, banyak kawan-kawan dah berubah from one phase to one phase. Dari single dan jadi berdua, dari belajar dah dapat kerja. Dan aku masih lagi sendiri, masih lagi tetap dok terperap dekat Garden of knowledge and virtue and it is almost six years. Dari PJ ke Nilai sampai ke Gombak tetap juga memegang gelaran yang sama, student undergrad. Yang lain, already move on to the next stage, yang kahwin, yang dah nak dapat anak, yang dapat happy-happy dengan duit sendiri. Bilakah masa saya akan tiba? Kalau di kira-kira walau pun sepanjang belajar kat sana banyak juga pengalaman, tapi still the experiences was not the same; ME as a STUDENT.
Dari PJ sampai ke Gombak, pernah juga pegang title in a relationship tapi akhirnya tak juga bawa sampai ke next stage. So maybe tak sampai seru lagi kot. Terfikir juga apa yang mereka-mereka sedang buat sekarang selepas masing-masing bawa haluan sendiri. Dah ada wife ke? Dah ada anak-anak ke? Yang pasti masing-masing mesti dah ada perubahan dalam hidup masing-masing. Yang sedia, maklum dia yang kat Bangi sana, bakal graduate end of this year. So, untuk awak dekat sana, Happy Graduation Day. Yang dekat sini, memang dah lost contact jadi di doakan semoga bahagia hendaknya dengan kehidupan. Yang jauh kat sana, rasanya dah jadi polis pun, kerja elok-elok.
Kalau di kira-kira tak banyak sangat pun kawan-kawan yang dah berubah dari cik kepada puan, tapi still as a 23 year old single student, I feel a bit worry. Mesti nak juga ada peneman nanti takkan la nak hidup sendiri sampai ke tua, at least bila berdua, ada yang care pasal kita, ada yang semak-semak dengan kita bila rasa hidupp ni sunyi. Seronok tengok masing-masing yang dah berdua. Kepada kawan-kawan semua, selamat di ucapkan, especially to Salmiah and Nur Afifa, baru je akad nanti dugaan tinggi bila bulan posa. Selamat Pengantin Baru!!! Buat Cik Fatini dan Cik Shiha, congratulation sebab masing-masing dah kerja. So lepas ni boleh la balik belanja kawan kat sini.
As a conclusion, sebagai seorang student memang rasa sangat jealous dengan mereka-mereka yang telah menjadi PUAN, yang telah dapat pegang duit sendiri. Tapi aku kat sini tetap juga enjoy my life as a student, consider myself as lucky then others who need to take care of their family and did not have the opportunity to study at all. Bak kata mama, my rezeki lambat sikit dari orang lain. Yang pasti saya sangat yakin dengan izin DIA, saya juga akan lalui setiap fasa yang mereka-mereka telah lalui cuma waktunya masih belum lagi sampai. Juga syukur pada DIA sebab dah kurniakan rezeki dan kehidupan yang sangat indah untuk saya.
