This is like hell...

Try to be patient and accept things as it is, as I know this might be one of my responsibility. But it comes to this one, I think this is out of my task. But why me? So, I believe in them this is just like hell. No more time to enjoy my life. He even lie to me about him having the sport thing. I involve in that too and I know there no such things as he said. Yes, just use me as you want and one day you'll be used just like when you used others. Shame on you. Can people just accept and do their own responsibility properly. Maybe they need someone to make them realize that responsibility should be taken seriously. I hope that I will not used others like they do.

Facebook status update v/s waniy

Facebook is a social network that is well-known among everyone. We can do many things via facebook. You share photos with your friends, send some messages to others, create a group to socialize with each other and the main thing is that you can share your status with everyone, every time or everywhere you are as long as you have the internet line with you. 

Some may like to update their status every hour; they really like to share everything they do with others. For me these types of person they like to be in the center of attention. They like people paying attention to them. Maybe they don’t have anyone by their side and want someone to communicate with. Otherwise, some people they only share sad, annoying, madness and dissatisfaction on their status update. In my opinion this type of person might be an emotional person, or maybe someone who do not person he or she really believe in to share all of this feeling. 

As for me I will update my status when I really mean it; My sadness, my madness, my impatient, or even my hopes and feeling of longing to someone or something. So, when I update my status it means that I am really serious about it. Sometimes I did not update my status for a week, or for a month, it means that I really have nothing serious in my mind. I’m trying to share something beneficial through the facebook, but sometimes me too as a human being was overly dominated with the emotion and unintentionally shared something negatives via my status update. 

Hence, I should have look at the facebook as a medium of sharing the only good things, sharing positives aura and bring motivations to friends and others. Unfortunately, this medium had been monopolized by people who had shared and used it as one bad thing. If only I can share my opinion with others, then facebook will be a better social network medium to enhance the morality and spread the positive aura and motivation.

Menerima dengan syukur...

2 minggu lepas dalam usrah kami ada bincang tajuk bersyukur atau redha, aku tak pasti, tapi rasanya dua-dua benda ni saling berkaitan. Selalunya apabila kita redha dengan sesuatu maka kita menunjukkan kita bersyukur dengan sesuatu biar pun kita rasa sesuatu yang terjadi seperti perkara keburukan kepada kita. Namun begitu sebenarnya kita pasti adanya sebab yang munasabah dan sesuatu yang tersembunyi untuk kebaikkan kita di sebaik segala kesukaran yang kita lalui.

Kebelakangan ini, aku terasa sangat bersyukur dengan apa yang DIA telah kurniakan pada diri ini. Seringkali saat lalai dan terlalu suka dengan nikat ini aku jadi terlupa bahawa hanya kepada DIA sebenarnya yang layakaku mohon kesyukuran ini. Terasa aku berada di dalam rahmatnya. Mungkin juga berkat doa ibu yang tak pernah putus-putus untuk kebahagian anak-anaknya. 

Dalam kegembiraan dan nikmat ini kadang aku takut aku jadi lalai dan leka dengan apa yang DIA kurniakan hinggakan aku terlupa untuk bersyukur. Aku mohon di kurniakan sahabat-sahabat yang akan sentiasa mengingatkan aku apabila aku terlalu leka dengan nikmatMU. Aku takut aku sebenarnya tak layak merasai kenikmatan ini. Adakah nikmat ini untuk menguji aku. Semoga aku tak lalai, semoga aku sentiasa mengingati dan bersyukur dengan nikmatMU.

Andai aku hitung semua nikmatMU maka terasa malulah aku kepada dirimu. Sedangkan terlalu banyak nikmat yang telah ENGKAU namun aku masih lagi kurang bersyukur. Aku mohon kepadaMu jangan engkau lalaikan aku dengan nikmat ini, dan ENGKAU jadikan aku golongan yang sentiasa bersyukur padaMU dan sentiasa mengingatiMU.

Sekolah baru, new school but still in Jitra...

Setelah hampir separuh hari di JPN Kedah mendengar taklimat kami akhirnya di berikan memo untul lapor diri. Memo di sampaikan oleh pengarah pendidikan sendiri, En. Mansor bin Lat. Lutut aku rasa lembik, lama menunggu nama aku di panggil dengan sejuk lagi dalam dewan Al-Farabi tu. Tambah pula kejutan pagi waktu mendaftar masih terasa.

 Hati berdegup kencang, there are butterflies in the stomach bak kata omputih. Elok aku nak sain nama just like everyone, aku dapat satu kejutan, what is that? Aku tertengok nama aku silap ka? Absolutely not. I was listed under boarding school together with other 8 candidates. Even though it is only interim, but still, is there no one else to be put in the boarding school. 

 Aku dah gelabah, mula sms mama, mama kata ok la, senang sikit. Ya, senang nak ajar or senang dengan budak-budak aku tak pasti, tapi hati aku bergelora dengan risau. Bukan nak bezakan anak-anak dekat boarding school dengan sekolah biasa, tapi katanya budak-budak boarding school ni pandai-pandai belaka. Aku ni belajar pun kat SMKA saja, walaupun dah 4 tahun belajar untuk mengajar, aku tak rasa aku layak nak ajar budak-budak ni. Nanti sampai satu masa aku takut, parent will come and complaint to the school about me. 

Tapi dalam hati mengharap alang-alang dah dapat sbp, biar la dapat SM Sains Kubang Pasu, terasa la tak gerun sangat. Aku buka memo dengan tangan yang shaky macam orang parkinson dah. YEAH, it's not KUBANG PASU SCIENCE SCHOOL but it's mama's old school nama lama JENAN, or SMSAH or SEKOLAH MENENGAH SULTAN ABDUL HALIM. Aku terpinga-pinga, tak tau nak cakap apa, sampaikan bila kawan tanya aku hanya mampu tunjuk memo.  

Memang la  meluruhkan jantung. Bakal melaporkan diri 9 MAC depan, aku pun tak tau apa perasaan aku sendiri.Obviously nervous, confuse, lack of confident and confounded. I hope I can do well, and try the best to deal with the challenges.

Bakal berubah arah...

Setelah tiba-tiba nama tercalon sebagai seorang calon Interim, aku meletak jawatan berkuat kuasa 24 jam. Gelabah tiba-tiba tengok nama keluar, sebab tak dapat pun panggilan dari JPN macam cik Dina. Tapi hati tetap tak senang, cuba semak dekat laman KPM, sekali keluar nama. Takut juga kena di arahkan bertugas di seberang laut, tapi alhamdulillah, aku hanya di suruh menyemak di JPN Kedah, walau jauh mana pun, masih lagi di Kedah. Namun getar hati ni, masih tak reda, sebab belum lapor diri dna semestinya belum tahu dan maklum di mana aku bakal bertigas kali ini. Masih menanti dan berfikir di mana sekolah atau kawasan yang kekurangan guru bahasa Inggeris. Di kawsan pedalaman mana, apakah nasib aku di sana, di mana harus aku tinggal, bagaimana hari-hariku yang mendatang. Tapi apa yang menggembirakan diri ini, sempat juga bercuti selama seminggu. Aku selesaikan segala kerja di sana hari Khamis lagi bersama surat letak jawatan aku serahkan kepada pengetua. Hari Ahad aku datang bersama semua kerja yang aku perlu siapkan  agar dapat aku tinggalkan dengan tenang. Selesai segalanya, aku pulang dengan rasa dada yang lega. Namun hanya ada sesuatu tetap juga menganggu fikiranku, anak-anak yang aku tinggalkan. Mungkin aku gembira dapat menghayati cuti walau untuk beberapa hari ini, namun di hati ini tetap juga terfikir anak-anak yang aku tinggalkan tanpa guru di sana. Moga mereka ke temu guru yang lebih baik dari diri ini. Itu saja yang aku mampu doakan buat mereka, hanya yang terbaik. 

Pray for LAHAD DATU...

We are here, we can still sleep peacefully, eat deliciously, smile happily and play blissfully, but we don't know what happen to our brothers and sisters there, at Lahad Datu. Some had already lost their love one, pray for them may they rest in peace. Although we are still enjoying our life here, without any feeling of worries but still as a Malaysian we should also think about our sisters and brothers who might be suffering and trying to find a safer place for their family. We might not have the power to do anything to stop the commotion but we might give some hopes and support for those who are living in the fear. The only thing we can do is to pray and hope for this thing to end quickly and may Lahad Datu return to be a peaceful place again.  

It’s my choice!

To take or to leave it, it’s my own decision. Don’t ever say anything; I had consulted that person in charge which I believe he may guide me to the right decision. It’s my destiny written by HIM, and I really believe it’s the best for me. Therefore, I hope everyone will happily pray for me as this is the path that I want to go on with. Sometimes people might see it as a bad thing because of the jealousy but there’s no need of the jealousy because you’ll never know when HE will grant you with the better opportunity. Sometimes HE takes something from you for reasons that you will never do, but we really need to believe that it’s the best for us. He might want to give you something better to replace what HE took from you. Never stop believing that there is always something good that has been planned for you. Don’t be jealous to others and never ever has any bad feeling or hatred when people get what you really want. You never know what is best for you. The only one who knows about it is HIM. So just pray to HIM, so that HE’ll grant you something good for you.