It’s end of October!

Terasa macam baru habis cuti panjang yang penuh dengan suak duka, tiba-tiba terkejut diri ini bila tengok kalender, it is already the end of October. For me, tak ada benda sangat nak di kejar, but for my beloved little brother, my oppa and butler, he’s struggling for the big examination. I’ll always pray for the best as I know that this examination might determine the future of oneself. So kepada Cik Muhammad Syakir, sila la study. Jangan dok main-main sangat, study tu betoi-betoi, toksah dok kira nak mengelat ja, baca satu baris ayat, pastu tidoq. Jangan dok banyak khayal sangat nak cik abang. 

Tapi bila end of October, final examination juga just around the corner. Just settle with one micro teaching, a quiz, an instructional aid, 3 lesson plan, observation, inventory, etc. Oh, baru sedar, bila dah list down all of the works rupanya dah banyak kerja yang siap. Dan banyak lagi kerja yang bakal datang bertimpa-timpa especially last minutes works, belum campur lagi dengan kelas ganti yang madam janji nak buat sebab class selalu cancel. Waktu class cancel, semua pun senyum meleret, tapi waktu nak ganti tu, macam-macam alasan. 

Menghampiri hujung-hujung ni, terasa sedih pula. Kenapa? This is my last semester nak bersenang lenang with the gang. Kenapa? Sebab this semester is the last semester that I got to study in this peace garden of knowledge and virtue. Next semester will be very tough. I’ll be an English teacher, here at KL or Selangor or Gombak, who cares anyway but the fact that I’m gonna be a teacher that make me feel so afraid. Kenapa? Sila lihat sekeliling anda, how do the students react to their teachers? How do they talk with their teacher? Takut kot. Especially for those young teachers. I had experience this before, when I was doing my SOP. Hoping for better students, it doesn’t matter if you are not that clever, or you are not listed as good students, but as long as you respect the teachers, one day you’ll find your own success and happiness. That is my thinking until now on. 

Mengharap dapat anak murid yang baik macam diri ini.  Baik ke? Walau pun tak baik sangat, tapi tak pernah nak lawan cikgu, walau tak baik sangat tak ada la nak ponteng class, or walau tak baik sangat tak pernah nak bising-bising bila cikgu ada dalam class. Sebab? Perasaan hormat dan patuh pada cikgu yang tersemai. Cikgu perlu di hormati, supaya berkat la ilmu yang kita belajar. From my observation, students sekarang tak respect cikgu, yang pandai dengan cara yang pandai,yang “nakal” dengan gaya yang nakal. Nak salahkan sapa dalam kes ni? Sila renungkan sendiri. 

Entry yang merapu hari ni sebab melepas stress baru habis test. Macam biasa, kalau ada yang bertanya how about your test? OK! It’s simple, accurate and constructive. Just wait for the result.

ATYCHIPHOBIA

What is Atychiphobia? Atychiphobia is an irrational fear of failure that will eventually hold back an individual so strongly that they will refuse to do anything that they cannot assure their success on. In  a simple term, atychiphobia is a fear to failure. This type of phobia may give some bad effect to your daily life. For example one's may refuse to try something new because he/she afraid that she will fail in doing that things. This type of people sometimes may not enjoy their life likes other.

There are several factors that may cause this phobia. Some of the causes are; early life causes, like demeaning parents or siblings, or traumatic events where a major embarrassment was the result of some minor failure.  Afterwards, the fear keeps building as the failures and embarrassment add up over childhood.  It doesn't help that our culture seems to imply that perfection can be achieved in looks, relationships, careers, etc.  Perfection is an illusion, but the person with atychiphobia won't try until perfection is assured. 

Do you suffer atychiphobia? What are the symptoms of this phobia? Some of the symptoms includes:

• Extreme mental anxiety
• Digestive Issues
• Headache
• Muscle Tension
• Panic (rapid breathing, dry mouth, sweating, nausea)

One of the treatment for this phobia is self help. You need to help your self. You need to accept that some failure is needed for you to success. You need to face the challenges in your life, never aim for the perfection in the life. Perfection is an illusion. 

 

References:

http://www.way2hope.org/Illnesses/atychiphobia-fear-failure.htm

http://myanxietyattacks.com/anxiety-disorders/phobias-fears/atychiphobia

http://www.allaboutcounseling.com/library/atychiphobia/
http://www.way2hope.org/Illnesses/atychiphobia-fear-failure.htm

Photo shoot with my TEASLIAN friends...

from left: Dina, Ian, Farah, Nana, Fatin, Me (with red ears) Nur, Yana

Last Friday I had a photo shoot with my dearest friend from the education institute.  Maybe this was our last time being together in a picture before all of us graduated. Next semester will be our practical semester so it will be a little difficult to gather with each other. It was a fun moment and will be appreciated for this semester. We’ll get our photo next week and I am very excited to see how the picture was come out. One of my friends even thought of us as a preschool teacher. Is there any enough time for me to change for a preschool teacher? We are trying to enjoy the moment as we can. Don't want to miss any single moment to enjoy this study period.

The first grand instructional aid ever.

Before this I never had done something that need to be though for a very long time. I need to prepare for many things. This semester require me to do something different from my normal doing. Before this the assignments that need to be done was just something written that require not much creative thinking. 

Last semester I need to do the micro teaching but require not so much preparation except for the lesson plan. My lesson plan had been rejected for several times before it had been approve by the lectures. I didn’t need any grand material for my micro teaching. It was enough with the worksheet or the power point or maybe some video. 

This semester teaching writing class has required me to do an instructional aid. I was panic because I never done it before plus there was so many things need to be followed. He has his own ways to do the instructional aid and he also wants us to follow his ways. For example; do not use the manila card but mounting board, it is sturdier and use alphabet block, no hand writing in the instructional aid. If it possible no video or something that is connected with IT. 

Although I am not a creative person, I tried my best to find something that meet his demand and as possible get the full marks for this individual assignment. The first problem I encountered was that the mounting board was so big and it did not fit in the motorcycle box. When I bought the mounting board I need to walk from the center to my mahalah, left my motorcycle at the center. It was a problem for someone who usually rides a motorcycle to class. The idea did not came as smooth as I thought, the mood to do this thing also come and goes in the time being. But at last I manage to do finalize my work. Although it is not that good like other people may do but this the best from me. 

before (50% in progress)

it's done!

It is useful and can be use in many classes. It is also can be recycle to do other things. It is sturdy and one thing that I really hope is that it meets the demand of my beloved lecture. I know some people can do it better than I can give, but this my first time preparing something like this.

A night at I-City...

“Malas la kot nak ikut bebudak ni” the first thing that came in my mind when suddenly they asked me to go with them for some jalan-jalan during the weekend. But actually when they said they want to go to I-City my heart started to wavered. I never go to the I-City before. I want to go but there are many works to be done. I also need to finish my lesson plan and all the material for the micro teaching. 

That Saturday they went out so early in the morning, send off a sister at the LCCT and then when for a convocation at one of the university here. Surprisingly they went back to the room before they started their journey to I-City. I was so stress with the work and here comes in my mind, just forget all of the work and go have some fun this weekend. They made some cocktail and brought it to Shah Alam. 

We were not so lucky because we were stuck in the traffic jam for about an hour because of an accident. And then need to rush trying to find a petrol station because we already run out of the gas. Thank God that the car did not stop in the middle of the road. And finally arrive at the I-City around 10.15 pm. We had our cocktail and get ready for the journey. I guess that we can reach back at Gombak on time but suddenly we change our mind to do an overnight outing. 

Although there were not so many things to explore but I had some good times with the roommates. Played around until 1 am, and suddenly they changed their mind want to go back to the hostel. Trying to figure out some excuse to be given to the security guard but finally had made decision that we’ll not be back that day. We had stop at a petrol station for some sleep. 

At the moment, one thing that I had been thinking was that the program I need to attend early in the morning that Sunday. We manage to enter the mahalah around 5.30am. I got some sleep after the subuh prayer and around 7.30am I already attending the water confident program, a compulsory program for a final year student. 

the cocktail made by Arina and Syida

with Syida before the fun begin

miss engineer is trying to figure out the circuit

with adik bongsu

the roommates

Arina, Me, Syida, An

 I'll pray for Him that we'll always be together and our life will be bless with the rahmat and hidayah from HIM.

Aku, kerja dan kek coklat…

Aku, semenjak masuk final year ni bertambah relax. Dah tak macam the past semesters. Macam tak cukup rehat and macam tak cukup jam kalau boleh nak tambah jadi 25 jam.tapi sekarang ni memang tak payah tambah cuba yang tak cukup jam sebab aku sendiri tak pandai lagi nak manage my own schedule. So bila masuk semester baru ni memang la sangat semangat sebab nak study hard so that I will never regret the opportunity given to me. Yes, I had tried to suppress my schedule to be more pack. And I think that was my own fault, to make me more stress. Bila aku sendiri yang menyebabkan diri ini stresses well do not blame others. Sebab aku jenis yang kerja bila ada mood, terpaksa buat semua kerja when the mood comes. Kerja memang nampak tak banyak tapi amat remeh. But I don’t mind cause I like it very much especially the part that I need to do the instructional aid. When the works become more complicated I tend to like it more. People might think that I’m a weird person but that is me. 

Kerja, memang sangat banyak. Phonology with the inventory, writing with the script writing, instructional aid, lesson plan and micro teaching, teaching method 2 with the lesson plan, story writing, instructional aid, take home test and what not and grammar class with the interview, lesson plan, the website. All of the works listed were the one which may take time to be finished. Kerja kadang-kadang buat kita stress. Well I’m the type that easily gets stress with all of the burden. Tapi compare with bila tak ada kerja nak buat better let me be preoccupied with all of those works. Dalam sibuk-sibuk minggu convocation still lagi sempat siapkan 2, 3 kerja yang senang-senang. Dan kalau dan bosan sangat kerja juga yang aku suka buat. Dalam banyak-banyak kerja the easiest work that I think and it is also fun is the phonology work. The inventory and the sentences make me revise the dictionary from A to Z. 

meja study yang sangat penuh

Kek coklat, last week IIUM held a chocolate fair and the halal exhibition at KAED gallery. The first thing that I encountered at the exhibition was the chocolate cake. Boleh testing lagi. Rasa sangat heaven. Rasa macam lama sangat dah tak makan the moist cake chocolate. Walaupun baru je makan 8secret recipe but this is different. So memang tak lepas peluang la nak beli. Sangat best. jalan-jalan dekat dalam gallery ada coklat-coklat handmade, but something yang tak boleh nak di terima, suddenly je, tak ada minat langsung nak taste all of the chocolate and bought something at the booths. Maybe sebab memang dah target nak beli that chocolate cake kot. Jalan-jalan lagi, jumpa kedai kain from Terengganu. Ada jual kain batik lukis. Memang cantik sangat, tapi duit pun cantik la kalau nak beli. Well, boleh tengok la saja. Pusing-pusing, jumpa booth jual buku pula, did not stop or else ada ja  benda yang nak beli. Last bila dah penat kedai chocolate cake je la yang aku singgah. Surely, this chocolate cake help me to cure my stress week. Makan ja chocolate cake rasa macam semua problem hilang. Magic sungguh.

chocolate yang memang magic

 Walau letih atau stress macam mana pun, life must goes on. Work need to be done. Whether you like it or not, it is your responsibility as a students. Need to be honest towards our self. Complete the work and be happy.